BEING THE OTHER WOMEN

BEING THE OTHER WOMEN

By Rebecca Masina

How does it feel being the other women and knowing that you are one? Are there any benefits that come with being the other women? What are the gains? How do you respond when they ask you questions about being the other women? How will the first women feel when she finds out that you are busy with their partner and you know of their existence? Are you planning to take her spot? Have you been guaranteed that the spot will soon be yours?

Totally you must be confused. Isn’t it that the first thing that he must have done when he realized that he is in love with you was to leave the person that they are involved with? Oh I forgot that you know of the first women. Keng are you interested in polygamy? Keng banna bafedile or vele wena you are a marriage/relationship breaker?

We are totally not against what you believe in. well after all its your choice but do not expect to be the first as you know there is someone already in that position. Keng it’s called sacrificing for the one you love or you hoping for something or you have plans for that? Lol ai shame some people, you like giving your selves endless and unnecessary jobs/responsibilities.

Holding or trapping him with a baby is not an option my dear. Ba tsamaya ntse hole byao.

Have you ever thought about your reputation? Or you ae that type that does not care about what other people say or think?, obviously it is not about other people but you and your person but hey you must be ready for anything that comes your way. Your life is precious and you deserve better than being second best. No one is opposing anything. It is your life, live it and live it to the fullest.

Love and respect yourself. Consider self-love and self-worth before anything.

 

WE ALL HAVE A CHOICE

WE ALL HAVE A CHOICE/DISRESPECT

By Rebecca Masina

We all have problems or what we may call challenges in our lives especially when growing up. Maybe you lacked confidence during your formative years. Perhaps you received little love and encouragement. Possibly you might remember the constant fights that took place in your home and how they shred your family apart. Sometimes blaming yourself that you may be the reason why your parents are no longer together. Even bigger, having to live with the fact that your own parents neglected you or they were abusing you physically or verbally.

Life will always be unfair as most of you take it.  All in that it does not mean that we should lose respect because you do not know what respect it. Yes you may grew up hectic but giving respect to your elders regardless of what they did to you is the best you can do. Revenger has never been sweet as they say. Respect gives you the light, gives you the way, and opens up for you every door that you would like to enter. It shows you life, a better life. So keep it and use it everywhere you go.

Be the change that you want to see in others.  Love and respect others. Be you.

 

 

I CANT GET ENOUGH OF YOU

I CANT GET ENOUGH OF YOU

By Rebecca Masina

Thursday, January 7, 2016

A new year it is. People make resolutions for every year but only they know if they do stick to them or not. Well I for one am not a fan of making resolutions. Reasons being that I never follow them or try to.  This year I pray it be a good year for me as last year I cannot say it was a good year for me. Life happened and life goes on. We thank God for another day as is indeed a blessing.

Have you ever thought of how some other things can make you feel like it is only a dream and you will soon wake up from it? Well yeah I got that and guess what it is not a dream at all it is reality. God blessed me. I might not have a lot and I might not have a name to anything but hey, I am a happy women and each and every day I thank God for it.

He brought a special gift to me. A lot has taken place but now I know my worth. You know when you are treated like the women you are, and then you know you are doing something right to the right person. Past months I’ve learnt a lot about respect, love, loyalty and communication. I got one and hey each and every minute I get a smile on my face.

Gosh I RIRI am in love.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

ABUSE AND FORGIVENESS

Abuse and forgiveness

By Rebecca Masina

How do you begin to forgive someone who abused you intentionally? How do you begin to forgive someone who took what you have for them for granted? Someone who made your life seems so useless you even thought of committing suicide? Do you believe in good life after forgiveness? Yes you might have forgiven but does your heart and mind really forget?

They say time heals but really? How many of you have been through such stages and have forgiven and forgotten? It takes a very good heart to forget about such. Abuse is a very big thing in our country and it is continuing to happen. Most people are afraid to speak out, in fear of being judged. Keeping something in your heart will definitely kill you.

Abuse comes in different ways. Most suffer from physical and emotional abuse. Look you deserve better than being abused. There is more to life than to be with someone who abuses you and tomorrow say they are sorry, they did not know what was wrong with them and that they will never do it again only for it to happen few hours after they have apologized. They might be the only people you have in your life but really somewhere out there, there is help. Let’s take down our pride and open up. Try to get help. In that you might be taking the step into helping those in need of help. No one deserves to be abused in any sort of way.

Yes we love them. But let’s love them enough to let them go. No one should commit suicide in the name of love. Love should be love not abuse. Love is happiness, respect, joy, trust, communication, understanding, comfort, laughter and growth.  No one is allowed to be abused and say it’s been done because they are being shown love. Wake up. Someone who loves you will never abuse you. Even the obsessed lovers never lay a hand on their loved ones.

Give love, trust, and respect if you also want to be given them back.1/7/2016

                        

 

 

 

OE GAPA LE NAMANE/DINAMANE

OE GAPA LE NAMANE/DINAMANE

By Rebecca Masina

These days it has come to a point where almost every female has a child which a relationship with the other parent has failed or maybe because of certain circumstances like death came.

The elders will tell you if you love him/her you must also be able to love and accept his/her kids unconditionally. You simply cannot compete with a parent and his/her kids because there it is a sure thing that you will never win not even by a long shot. Again you cannot tell him/her to choose between you and his/her kids.

Situation will be what if he decides to merry her with her kids? Would the kids also use his surname? And if so what about the culture? How will it work out as people of tradition will say that every kid has to be introduced to their ancestors? When they are doing that to their biological kids what will happen to the one who came with the mother and what if she or he also needs rituals to be performed for him or her while she or he is using the surname that his or her mother currently use which is her marital surname?

Sometimes turn to have a problem accepting their parent’s new partner and makes it difficult for a parent which it will end up as if she or he hates the kids. That is why taking another women’s or men’s kids its difficult at the end reports of hatred and abuse arise.

Ho e gapa ledi namane it is not easy at all. It takes guts and again the love you have for your partner. Things we do for love.

 

 

 

YOU ARE THE ISSUE AM TALKING ABOUT

You are the issue am talking about

By Rebecca Masina

Some people like to claim their nonsense on other people. They don’t want to be wrong but always right and always winning. Well that cannot happen every day, not in my world.

I have been living in one deep dark hole that I always kept quiet and looked at everything that is happening and also watch everything as it happens in front of me and do nothing because I am avoiding noise from the empty tins.

I, myself am not a saint but please just because I cannot say a thing to defend myself it doesn’t mean that I am wrong in anything. Given a chance to speak, yes I would speak. But well since that there is too much noise and you only want your voice to be the only one to be listened to, then I shall keep being in that deep dark hole. But I promise you the day I come out, you will not even utter a word as it will be my chance to speak. Yes continue doing as you please. As they say every dog has its day.

Truth be told I regret every single moment

 I am not pissed, angry or anything but I am only saying what is on my heart and mind. It is wise to think before you take any action so that you don’t later regret anything. It is usually hard for me to utter my feelings to anyone especially where there is lot of judgments. I am not perfect. I am still learning this life. Allow me to be me. Are you not tired enough that you have already taken my pride away? What more do you want as I don’t think I poses anything of value but life. Or is it my life that you want to yourself? Well that is all up to God to decide.

Take whatever you want from me but hey life is only owned by the Mighty One and I know that one day He will hear my prayers, my cries and Answer me. All things come in the right times. Am not in rush because it is Gods call not mine. Take everything but my soul only belongs to God.

 

WE WILL PROPOSE

WE WILL PROPOSED

BY Rebecca Masina

Aichii ke neng kemo shebile this guy?  I tried by all means to get his attention but luck was not on my side at all. Years went and in my mind I though no this person does not see me the way I see him. Okile wa bona o shwa oe kepela ka motho empa yena a sego mo wena.That breaks the hearts of so many people.

This days when you need or want something you go for it ka nama. Don’t send someone. So it happened that I did not have the guts to confront him and tell him how I feel about him. Honestly what I had and still have is real. I then sent my so trusted friend to help me with the issue that has been troubling me for years. Well for two years and few months.

Few days later only to find out that they are an item. Hehehe that killed me as if I lost something valuable to my life. Well after all I’ve learned that sa mogwera ke saka lol. Joking.

I would make small chats with this guy but hey gwa pala. It was like he was so ignorant or he had someone already. Pelo ne ebaba those days yoh. Leleme le tatagane. That is when I felt how hard it is for some guys to approach girls. For once I was in their shoes.

Time went and hey we grew up and life became life as it is. The other moved and hey, I thought we were never to see each other and even if we do then it would be on that greeting level and nothing else.

Little did I know that guy was also feeling the same way it was just that thing called *gwababa* lol well we both have it ke.

 

STRONGER THAN PRIDE

My love is stronger than pride

By Rebecca Masina

Sheba, when I utter the words I love you, I really mean them. Not everyone mean those words when they speak them, but hey I am not everybody, I am me and I am different. Don’t compare me with the last person you were with. We can all be females but I so truly possess something that not every female does. Hence I say I am me and I don’t live to fix other peoples mistakes.

Accept me as I am and don’t change me, don’t even try because you might not like the change that you would have created. I don’t judge you because you have what and you don’t have what. My love is stronger than pride sweets. Nje ngoba uze ngakhona, I will take you as you are. Bayasho that love alone will not pay bills and all but tlohela bao ko nna. Batho batlo phela ba bolela ka melomo e metelle okare di ostrich.

Do they know what got us together at first? Bo mmaditaba lebo rre ditaba. Whose judging them with their big houses and cars? Haibo leave us alone. My love is stronger than pride. Ungasho ukuthi “sobona niyo phelelaphi” but really that doesn’t matter to us. All we do is love each other unconditionally. Wena stay there with your Evogue guy/lady and enjoy. Tlohela rona bo malambane, ngeke us'khone. We are far more than money and material.

Yeah vele motho waka ke a street vendor so what? #phumakithi#.  Sheba/kgona tsa hao.

The society nowadays all they do is to judge other people based on what they do and what they have. So it is like when you don’t have anything it means you don’t deserve to be loved. What is that? Kanty the meaning of love comes with money and something else? Tell us phela we don’t know. Or we interpret it differently?

We only live once, so mara let us love and live this once#ONETIME

“Ebunzimeni siyo themba njalo. Ngeke sililahle ithemba. Noma kumnyama U Somandla Uyosi khanyisela”-we say.

 

Makhwapheni

MAKHWAPHENI

By Rebecca Masina

Hahaha so bophelo bo mnate neh? You even settle for being a side dish. How does it feel though, knowing that you are second best? Better yet knowing that you are just a booty call? Aledi tshabe struu. Anyways everyone has a choice in their lives. We can’t really judge you for being you.

The next moment you are pregnant. Enklek what are you going to tell that baby? “Ke nyatsi ya papa hao”? Lol that sounds nice neh?

Eisan please remind me what are you doing with a side dish? We not saying don’t have one or have one, but aren’t you satisfied at home or? Then if not why not leave the poor lady and continue life with the side dish? Askere if you are not happy, you leave? Cheating is not an option but a choice.

Later there’s a child out of wedlock, demands for maintainance are coming in like a tsunami. How should the main one feel? You come ka excuse, ‘’Monna ke selepe ra adimisana”. Hehehe who taught you that? Is that person educated or? Education does not mean going to school only.
Yes our cultures might say that but aowa this is the 21^st century. People die. There are lots of diseases and innocent people die because of what you call culture. Imagine if that was being done to you.

Kana what is interesting about having multiple guys? All sleeping with you and not protected? What is the gain? Wena you are called “”our meal” and yet you don’t even have a heart to say that hurts but it makes you to rejoice and keep doing it as if you are going to get a degree at the end. Mara vele you will get that dgree called aids and pregnancy not knowing who the real father is.

Ostlaela. This is life not some Disney dream land. Wake up. Take care of your life and body. You ought to know you deserve better than being a side guy/chick. Go out there opportunities re galore.

RESPONSIBLE ROLE PLAYERS

RESPONSIBLE ROLE PLAYERS

By Rebecca Masina

Every kid would like to grow knowing both their parents and also to get both their love. This nowadays not everyone can be a parent. Yes you can have kids but not take responsibilities for them. It is always said that guys don’t care about being parents and that it is a job of a women to take care of the kids.  That might be right but mind you the kids where not only made by one person but two. So as I say both parents are responsible for growing and supporting the kids.

Life is hard. You would even thin that this is the end of the world.  With things that are happening in this life haibo it’s hard to tell some things. People love each other so dearly that they even promise each other trains on a tar road. Come pregnancy one has to run away. Huh! How right is that?

Oh kana its women’s month neh!! Guess what? Not all women with or without kids can take care or responsibilities of their children or their siblings. Ngwana o hodiswa ke sechaba, but this days you will hear them saying “ase ngwana waka”. We praise women so bad that we forget that they are not all innocent. Mosadi otshwara thipa ka bogaleng, mara nou so, you will hear and see babies being abandoned some found dead as fetus in dustbins. What kind of a woman does that? That is taking down the pride of all women around the world.

Clinics are made for a reason. Yeah those nurses might be rude and all but it is your life after all. Take responsibility for it and stop killing innocent souls.

We as women turn to give men wrong names and insult them hence some turn to give up when it comes to supporting their kids. Not every guy will run away from their responsibility but we as women we push them away.  There are a lot of guys out there that would love to be part of their children’s life but because of their situations they are denied access to them. Then later they name and shame them of not being responsible for their actions.

Guys out there do hustle. You loved him from the beginning knowing that he has nothing but today you have a kid with him you deny him access to see his kid just because “ke malambane” really now? When the kid grows and asks for his/her father you tell him/her that they abandoned him/her. Haibo mosadi keng nah?

BIG UPS TO ALL RESPONSIBLE FATHERS OUT THERE.

 

 

 

HELLO CHEATERS

CHEATERS

BY Rebecca Masina

No woman deserves to be treated like second class, especially the mother of your kids. Be of you are still together or not. Imagine if someone was to treat your mother or your sister like second class, how would you feel about that?

Treat her like the queen she was when you first met her and lied to her that you love her and promised her the world. You told her she is your everything, but today you are cheating on her as if she does not exist. You even do it in front of her to show her how proud you are about what you are doing.

Look she will stay and keep trying to get you back because she loves you and she needs her kids to grow up knowing their father. “O tshwara thipa ka bogaleng byale kage mosadi aswanetse kego dira”. You taking her efforts for granted and the worst part of it is that you are physically and emotionally abusing her.

Do you know how hard it is to keep calm and let things be? Do you know how hard it is to tolerate the things you man do? We get hurt and we heal ourselves because of the love we have for you yet you still find cheating as an achievement.

Ore monna ke thari wa naba? Hebanna! Did she sign for that? Remember you told her that she’s the only women in your life? Remember you told her you are a one women man? What is all that? Keng neo mo shayashaya so that she will agree to everything you say? Tjo osehlogo shem sies arg

Tomorrow you will bring sickness in the house and next minute you will be blaming her saying she’s the one who brought the sickness when you know very well she has been loyal to you all the time and you are the one who messed up. Cheating never brought good things into a relationship. If you are not happy then set her free.

Why don’t you let her go? Every time she tries to leave you threaten her and you even promise to change but that’s all a lie. What if someone did all that to your own blood? What are you teaching your kids? Your siblings? Keng ke setso sabo lena sere byao?

What is it that she lacks, that makes you to go outside and look for it? Can’t you sit down and talk to her? I doubt what you do is what real man do.
If she’s truly our women then treat her with respect or let her leave.
She deserves better than that.

psychcentral.com